Tuesday, June 17, 2008

THE COMIC HERO

hey guys, i am so so sorry that i couldnt turn up for ages, guess where i was...i am waiting....still waiting...and well, how can you guys guess, unless you have some clairvoyance or something. anyways, i was in the hospital with jason...and now youll ask what happened. so, cutting long story short, mr. jason did a suicide attempt, but failed miserably that he got his limbs all screwed up. i guess hell stay here for a couple of days. how he did it...hmmm....jumped from his university roof, tryin the superman stunt' my last wish before dyin' as he calls it. well..he is groaning with pain and i am such a pathetic friend that i cant stop laughing my head off.
the reason...even more interesting. 'i am fed up of my life' ok, acceptable, but why? hahaha, because, i am so unsuccessful in love that the second girl who i loved turned out to be three timing. well, so much to say about her bravery, but this moron...hahaha...
ok, so my question, are men really becoming love loons in this era and is everything suddenly taking a toss with time? what i mean is, are girls really stepping into the medival mans shoe and turning into casanovas, and men on the contrary becoming lovelorn maniacs?
well...its all hypothesis and even the answer will be somewhat on those lines so ill leave you guys for guessing but just a suggestion for all those men out there. the next time you try any stunt, be more inspired by batman, atlöeast he is held by chords.
cya folks

Monday, May 12, 2008

TAN OR WHITE?

hey guyz! ok, so have you ever seen any ad of fair and lovely or any such fairness product? hi handsome hi handsome(remember? hilarious....) anyways, i encountered a really funny thing which i wish to share with you or grant you with the holy opportunity to know something really extraordinary.
so, today, again, no jason and like last time, i am too glad to be true. hes off on a vacation with some new chic who he calls 'my bikini babe', so, only when he comes back, youll get to know more about whats going on with him. i am not missing him so its better if you guyz dont too, and anyways, i am not that boring...or am i? whatever you might think, i dont give a damn and you just shut up your ugly mouths and read my story.
so what happened was that i was roaming around the streets of the country i am in (thine sacred name must not be taken) and i saw a really funny ad which was promoting skin tans and well, it was everywhere, every tram station, every street and well...everywhere! people are despirate to go black here and then, theres india. a country where women do not get guys coz they are not fair , a country where being fair is worshipped, where it has a huge significance to the extent of being rediculous. here, people see sun and they strip naked for a tan, and theres india, where people fear the sun as if its some one eyed monster.
so, my question. why are people not contended with what they have and why are they always finding the grass greener on the other side? is it just an attempt to be different or is it a fight to prove that youre a rebel, revolting against nature itself? whites wanna go brown coz everybody around them is white and browns wanna go white for the same idiotic reason. why have people stopped appreciating what they have? can humans be ever satisfied? now thats a million dollar question which nobody can answer, i guess.. so what would you like t have mam, a tan or white?

Tuesday, May 6, 2008

MASCULINISM

well, its been a long time, i guess, since you last heard from me and i am sure you must be worried and keen to know where ive been for so many days. well, dont worry i am alive and was around but had piles of projects to finish, so couldnt really find time for you guys(i know it sounds pretty rude...but well, truth is bitter my friend!)
anyways, today i have a very interesting thing to share, something which i truly believe in but sounds pretty lame to everybody who listens to me and they just simply stare at me as if i am some specie of an alien race speaking jamaican, and give that irritated expression which simply means 'dude! just listen to yourself, what shit are you talking?'
well, so today jason is not a part of the story for a change, and i am glad to have found some story without his holy involvement. so, what happened was that i accidentally opened the television last night(accidentally, because, it was actually an accident, an affair of chance my friend) and then when it was booming the house down, i decided that, well, when its opened i might aswell oblige the poor idiot box with my sacred stare. so, i aimlessly started flipping the channels to finally freeze on some news which was covering some women activists fighting for female rights, screaming 'we want rights for women' and stuff of that sort.
well, i watched that funny act for some time but honestly, it left me thinking. well, its a country which propogates equality and has given ,well, a little too much, come to think of it, rights and privileges to women that now men are, what i feel, deprived of rights. we have special quotas for women, special reservations for women, exclusive seats for women, but for men? nothing! because well, 'what are men? they dont need anything right? who cares about them, whose concerned about how much progress they make or whats their right and position in the society?`
funnily, the present day scenario is that women are being delivered all that the government call 'for the motive of equality' which is a bit more than equating, leaving men way behind the league. so is it our fault that we are more in population? thats not an excuse to snatch away our pride from us, and today i declare that i will stand up for male rights and unleash a new campaign of social justice called 'masculinism'. so all men of the world who feel that they are being pushed back into subservience, stand up and raise your voice, you have the freedom to rise, to voice your opinions and attain yout rightful throne. so what are you waiting for men, charge!!!!

Wednesday, April 30, 2008

LIFE OF NOTHINGNESS

Its pretty shocking and i wonder sometimes why people do not want a simple life, i mean, please! give me a break! well, hi folks, i am back again with yet another hair pulling, head banging story just for you....only for you, and look how nice i am not expecting even a thank you from all you guys for my enormous contribution to literature.
anyways, coming to the story which came to me just an hour back when for a change i found jason mute and i was thanking my stars for this wonderful day which reminds me now to earmark this date on my diary...it was indeed memorable, hey cmon, it was, ok, jason was quite for a change and i simply LOVED it. i nonchalantly sipped my tea not even bothering to ask what was wrong, i couldnt take risks you know, and then, guess what happened? he spoke and there went my perfect day of silence...all shattered and i am weeping in self pity right now and my stock of tissues is over too, shucks!!!
so, he began talking slowly about how boring his life has become...no events, no quarrels, no arguments, no nothing. life of nothingness he called it. and when i asked why, the reason would really want you to tear this guy off into tiny pieces and feed them to vultures.
you know what he said? 'remember the american guy i was having arguments with?...well, he has become nice to me of late and is not saying bad things to me and i have no spice left in my life, my life is insipid now...bland'
i stared at him for some time unable to get that on the first go till the time it slowly seeped in and i could only manage to change my expressions from confusion to mortification coz words were all lost...completely. i mean, cmon, here is a guy who wants a fight to add spice in his life? have you seen a bigger idiot? but well....it made me think........
so, my question, are people really not satisfied with a plain road in life? do they need bumps that they call spice always to fuel their souls and to keep them going? well..its amazing to understand the complexities of the human mind, the discontentment in contentment and thats pretty lame.
but i guess, thats what humans are all about, to perpetually ignite something to form fire and then find ways to extinguish that or save themselves. the idea is pretty complex, and somewhat perverted(not the cheap one) but i guess thats the way world moves...to find ways for entertainment and striving hard to fuel their lives with dynamism. and its not wrong, its but natural, but in jasons case...well...natural would be an unnatural word to use because well....jason is..jason.
so folks, if you ever find your life into nothingness....spice it up but not the jason way please...i beg please!!!

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

P:S: - I LOVE YOU

hello my beautifu lreaders...so how are all of you doing? i dont know why i am so happy today, i think because for a change i am looking a little better than jason, who usually is the bragger and flaunts his...well....i have to admit, good looks(it leaves a bad taste in my mouth).
ok, so todays story....pretty lame, but well...my job compels me to share all my crap...so, here it goes
ok, so jason and i went to a party last night and well, he doesnt drink but looked so intoxicated that you cant even imagine...but, well, it didnt even matter. so i took a chair away from the madding crowd and cradled a glass of chilled coke, simply observing the funny bunch of loons trying to do something they call dance but seemed more like aerobics. now...starts the story. mr. jason, oh my god, you wont believe, said 'i love you' to so many women that night that ive lmost lost my count(approx 32) no doubt they were all friends...but 32 women at a single go! not bad at all, infact i felt a bit envious (only a momentary emotion, dont bother) but soon, my mind, yet again...began its funny dissection.
so, my question has the phrase 'i love you' lost its true meaning? i mean, isnt it like abusing the purity of the word love by throwing it like junk on every tom dick and harry? i really have no clue whats the answer to this question is because its like a modern youth cults dialect which is difficult to comment on, but i surely believe one thing...love is love o matter what and to whoever you say, its just a matter of the way you say this and your meaning is conveyed. so better take care of your nonverbal cues coz if u do the slightest of mistakes in modulation, your target love will flee away and the other unwanted 'lovers' will stick to you like a magnet.
so dont worry, say i love you and spread the word of love all around, for love makes the world go roun round round (pretty lame? i told you)
happy loving!!!

Sunday, April 27, 2008

NECESSITY, HMMMM, SURELY A MOTHER OF INVENTIONS

well..not a bright and sunny morning today, but a cold sad night, a night of dismay, of total stillnes...blah blah blah, what a crap! well i just wanted to be a bit dramatic, so please pardon my stupidities and ill move on to my not so enthralling shit....yet again.
so, mr. jason didnt have anything new to tell me this weekend, it was his same old monotonous monologues of self appreciation that killed me bit by bit andfinally had to tell him to grab my neck and smother me than to subject me to this torture. so he shut up for a moment, but his moment in very literal terms is a moment, so, his series of blabber began yet again and in that, i caught a fragment that was worth sharing(still, dont expect much)
so, he was tellin me all about trisha(remember the kiss blooper? no? check the previous blog) so, trisha lives with a roommate, well, an apartment mate i can say, and as she is an indian, she wants all her meals to be the way she used to have in india, and well, she loathes ****** food(cant reveal the country, sorry!)
so, look at the ingenuity....necessity compels people to do such funny unimaginable things i tell you. well, indians have a staple food called rotis(thats the indian bread) which they really cant live without.so, trisha madam had to make that and for making that you need to roll it with a rolling pin,but, as she didnt have one, guess what she did? she used a glue stick to roll that, can u imagine?? this is the height of desperation i can say. moreover, her roomate, goes one step ahead. she got an iron from india which has a 3 pin plug which obviously cannot go into a two pin socket (which is used in that unnamed country). now she needed to iron her clothes and as she didnt have one, guess what she did? she heated the iron on a stove to iron her clothes. well, innovative, i must say.
so, my question, is innovation or the ability to create common in all of us, i mean, are we all capable of doing that? or is it only for selected individuals? well, what i believe is, circumstances and situations forcefully tap that unrecognized force of creativity that we usually in normal days fail to understand. so, all you people out there, you all are creative and are born with it....its just a matter of realization. so go and realize the true force within you while i go and buy a rolling pin for poor trisha.
be creative...stay creative. happy creativity!!

Friday, April 25, 2008

NAMASTE!!!!!

hello my dearest lads, i am back again with yet another episode of (well gimme some time to decide the title) ....whateva! who'll strain so much to flaunt unwanted creativity. anyways, coming to the point and the story of the day. intercultural communication, hmm, an interesting thing to think about but trust me, it brings with it some disastrous blunders and bloopers which makes you suddenly realize how embarassing things can become for you and you only pray at that moment ' hey god of the earth, bloody split open and gobble me down, i am in deep shit!)
so something of that sort happened with jasons dearest and sweetest girl pal called trisha. ok, so let me remeber from where it started......oh yes! so here is the story.............
jason went out yesterday with his girl pal (trisha as u already know, dumbass!) for a sight seeing tour around the town and as he had recently broken up with (you dont expect me to take that abominable name again, do you? read the previous stories and youll know)he was althemore happy to find a scapegoat in this sweet girl from india to drain all his pathetic stories of pain and separation on her. so what exactly happened was that they were busy taking pictures when suddenly out of nowhere, one of their classmates appeared accompanied by two of his friends. now this guy happened to be from mexico and she really hadnt met him before, except just an occassional hi. so he shook hands with jason and then turned to trisha and bent over. well, that bending over was inplied for a kiss on the cheek which, well, wasnt, quite sadly, understood by her. so...the gallant mexican tried again and ....(i am rolling on the floor, laughing my head off) she couldnt understand that, well....ha ha ha....yet another time. so the embarassed guy just stood there mortified for a couple of moments to finally declare in his funny baritone 'well, in mexico, we greet by kissing on the cheek, i guess ...wel, doesnt work everywhere' the poor guy left hiding his face literally in shame when after a long time trisha understood what his intentions were. she even apologised later to him, clearing all misunderstandings to what he just said ' well, dont worry, i am always unlucky with girls, no woman wants to kiss me'
quite a comedy of errors i must say. alls well that ends well, but for all those who meet with an indian woman the next time....dont dare to kiss, just do.............namaste!!! (ha ha ha )